Benefits cuts for the persistently overweight

For too long this country has been plagued by poor people who can’t afford to buy healthy food. They insist on buying four Greggs sausage rolls for a pound from Iceland instead of a Waitrose essentials fruit salad for £1.99. And they have chips instead of quinoa with their salmon (I am assuming when they say Fish and Chips, they mean salmon – right?). Idiots. The government has come up with a superbly evil plan for those people who can’t afford to buy healthy food – cut their benefits! That will teach them.

Even better – the overweight will be forced to go to therapy, despite the president of the British Psychological Society saying that it’s unethical, and anyway psychology can’t help people unless they want to change. So they are set up to fail from the start, ensuring their benefits are cut. Which means they can even less afford healthy food. It’s a beautiful evil spiral. Mwhahaha.

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